Swiss German for Beginners

Despite the fact that I've been here in Malix for three months now, I still speak next to NO German. Serves me right for taking Spanish all those years, I guess. The little I have learned is as follows:


Locations:
"Malix" - pronounce the world "mall" as if you were in Boston, then add "eeeks" to the end.


"Chur" locals drop the "C," but most train station workers say "Coor" (as in the beer without an "s").


"Ish-tal-I-za" - though I have never seen it written as such, this is what locals call Italy.


"Leichtenziner"- a nick-name for people from Liechtenstein (who are apparently the butt of some national joke that I know nothing about...)


"Heidi-lande" - the portion of the Alps just Northwest of Malix that is popular with commercial farmers and tourists. Also the setting of the original novels about Heidi, Girl of the Alps. 


Food:
"Spetzli" - pronounced "Sh-spets-ly," it's Swiss-German for picnic of greatness!


"Trokterfleish" one of the first words I was able to sound out (as it is in fact phonetic,) it refers to dried elk meat---kind of like salami or jerky.  


"Apfelwein"- translates to apple wine, though I have had a devil of a time remembering to turn my "w"s into "v"s and wisa wersa. (Curse you, Richard Wanger!!!)


"Zokten-Fotzel"- a local twist on French Toast in which stale bread is soaked in egg and milk for up to a few days, then drained and baked over potatoes and cheese.


Conversations:
"Ich Vice Nicht" - my most commonly used phrase. "I. Don't. Know."


"Greutze" -while I have long stuck with a simple "hallo," this mash-up of what sounds to my ears like "curtsy" with a hard "g" in front is the local greeting. 


  "Guese!"  - pronounced somewhere between "juice," "jews," and "chews," it is Swiss-German for goodbye/farewell.


"Danke Shon" - Thanks a lot


"Bitte"- the go-to word. It can mean you're welcome, please, what can I get you, see ya later, and plenty more depending on time, place and inflection.


"Prost!" - This one I got right away, thank goodness. It means "Cheers!" 


"Liden-Schwachkopf" - I'm told it is all out of love, but this is Jamie's favorite nick-name for me which translates roughly to "slow-learner" or, more than likely, "idiot."


I am however getting pretty good at reading cooking directions, travel instructions and letters from disgruntled teachers due to absolute necessity. "Hausarbeit?" Check! 


And that, save the days of the week, months of the year, and a few names and numbers, is about it for my linguistic education. I knew taking language classes from people called Jones and Bond and Peterson would come back to bite me someday!